The worst step for getting better at anything is questioning why you’ve bothered getting where I am thusfar.
I am always uneasy about what I should and should not say on the internet. There is so much I want to let out. So much I want to yell. There are also so many nice things that I think would only be ruined by letting the internet touch them.
This evening I saw a quote regarding that subject, but from long before the internet.
Travel and tell no one, live a true love story and tell no one, live happily and tell no one, people ruin beautiful things. Kahlil Gibran
Maybe that should be the default.
What I will share is this: you can’t opt-out forever. If you try to stay silent the world will find some way to make you open up. And if you’re not practiced in the discourse required of you, you are a lot less likely to feel great about the process. Self-moderation is much better than self-censorship.
Choose something to share, make your case, and stand by it. It doesn’t have to be published to the world: it can be with your colleagues, your school, your family. But don’t let all your thoughts be your own; just the private ones.
Sad news this morning. Branden Klayko, known in Louisville for his blog Broken Sidewalk, died recently. I never personally met him, but followed his work because his view of what Louisville could be matched what my ideal city should be.
When my wife asked what I wanted for Father’s Day, I asked for a date night. She made it happen and it was lovely. We went to Great Flood for beer and board games. Amber won almost all the games as we’ve all come to expect.
The Gutenberg editor has been a much hyped enhancement to WordPress this year. A beta plugin for the experience is now available for download in the WordPress.org plugin directory. Don’t take the risk of installing a beta plugin on a production site, it will work just as well locally hosted.
That said, if one hasn’t tried a page-builder plugin like Site Origin, the functionality feels pretty bizarre. Calypso may seem like a close jump in aesthetics, but when it comes to the button pressing it’s not at all the same. Compared to the current editor that comes in WordPress core… it’s hard to compare at all. This is the kind of change that would be the spearhead of a whole product redesign if WordPress wasn’t released so incrementally.
The “Text” version of the editor still needs work: the buttons don’t really do anything at all. But from the looks of things, once it’s ironed out it will feel very familiar to the Text editor in the current editor.
Who is excited for this new editor? Who is most leery? Who is this really a “big win” for?
There’s an insidious habit that forms in a lot of my colleagues and I found it forming in myself the last year or so. I imagine there are those in your office or other communities that fall prey to it as well. It would be easy to confuse with workaholism, but I find it to be different. The most proper word I can find for it would be flow addiction.
Being a flow state is inherently positive. It’s worth striving for. What troubles me is I find myself putting so much effort into finding flow in the workplace that it becomes hard to be doing anything else.
Working in support, the primary way my performance at work is measured is in the number of interactions I have with our customers. Our company has lots of smart people in it, so we have a lot of ways of looking at that data, and that interaction count can feel like a scoreboard if you let it. Each live chat inching you higher and higher in worth. Each point giving you a splash of endorphins.
Much of life isn’t set up with such a quick feedback loop. This is part of the craze to gamify things: my fitbit gives me a badge for hitting so many steps in an effort to make me more excited about walking the dog. But these tricks aren’t nearly as effective as true flow state, and I can get that on a regular basis doing my work.
The trouble comes that on a day off, or at night after work, the nagging that there is still more work that could be done just never stops. Even a nominally fun activity may seem way less desirable than getting a few more points on that scoreboard.
What it’s come to is a need to find more intention in my recreation. I’ve been doing a lot of revisiting with younger versions of me, and I think my best shot of making myself happier right now is upping my chess game.
Chess has always been enjoyable, but there have only been two phases of my life where I really took it seriously: first when I was in primary school (1st-4th grade) and then again in college from 2008 to 2010. My USCF rating peaked in 2009 at 1436, I think that was after playing in the Kings Island Open . Even among amateurs that’s not an impressive standing a strong club player is typically above 1800. If I’d like to reach that level it will stick a lot of effort.
Getting better at chess doesn’t have the quick feedback loop. Truly becoming better is a result of hours of study, and not as much from the time playing games. But playing the game absolutely does have that feedback loop and is still part of the process. You can set longer term goals, particularly if you’re willing to attend bigger tournaments every so often and treat those as tentpoles of performance. And there is a very literal scoreboard available: your rating.
My hope is to turn this problem on its head. If I can get these little excitements from more places, I’ll feel more balanced and happier. If this goes well I may try to take a similar approach in some way with parenting, as dorky as that sounds.
To start I did a read-through of Attacking Chess by Josh Waitzkin, one of the first chess books that was truly my own. Now I’m nailing down the Class D and Class C sections in Silman’s Endgame Course a few times over.
If you’d like to play, please find me on chess.com: backrow1720 .
My wife went back to work the first of the month. For three weeks we were both working full time jobs and the baby was still spending her days here at home. “It takes a village” is so right: we would not have gotten by if not for many hours of baby sitting provided by family and friends. In particular, my father-in-law was spending 10-15 hours a week here each morning. In addition to any baby sitting hours folks could provide I’d work from 6am-7:30am and 5:30pm-9pm most weekdays then as much as possible on weekends.
On top of all that was all the wrangling of enrolling in a daycare. All the best facilities have long waitlists – “up to year” was phrase I began to loathe. In the end we submitted application fees to three different places waitlists, and looked at doing a part-time schedule at less awesome facility that had no waitlist.
It was hard scrambling it all together, but thankfully my employer provided the flexibility of time that we were able to make it all happen. It’s really pushed me, but it’s all worked out. Grace started daycare today and it went as smooth as anyone could hope. A tiny bit of tears at the drop-off, but the rest of the day she was a champ.
I was glad to work a 9 to 5 for the first time in a while. I think I can finish this month out with a good amount of work completed and this stressful time behind me. Many thanks to everyone who’s helped us out this May.